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February 2004
The Blog Archive:
Grain Of Truth Publications presents:
Diary of an Ale-Fan
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February 2004
Sunday, 1st February 2004
To Have And Not To Have
Yesterday was a bit of a disaster really.
Got to the station in plenty of time, only to discover that our train had been cancelled due to “a driver shortage”. A bus had been organised in it’s place.
Even though Bury is on the line between Cambridge and Ipswich there are precious few trains to Cambridge and the times of those few are very little use to man or beast.
Anyway, we waited half an hour after the train would have been due to leave, only to be told that the bus had only just left Stowmarket, which would take it a further 25 minutes.
Bugger !
Our public transport system is shit. We never had these problems (in East Anglia) in the days of the state owned British Rail.
I phone the lady, who kindly ran me and my mate to Cambridge.
The Cambridge Winter Beer Festival was in a new venue this year. Further out of the city, and in rooms that were totally useless for holding a beer festival.
Despite the cramped and uncomfortable conditions we had some good ales (not a bad one amongst them) including Orkney Dark Island (4.6%) a truly wonderfully tasty dark ale, full of complex flavours, and Exmoor Hart (4.8%).
Bit of a curate’s egg really.
Monday, 2nd February 2004
It Says Here
I’ve not commented on Hutton up until now, unlike a number of other blogs.
I’m not a big fan of Our Tony, I do not in any way support war, and I do have a great fondness for the BBC, but I would like to sound a note of caution. Something along the lines of, people, glass houses, and the throwing of stones.
This government has a lot of blood on it’s hands, but I feel sure it was the hounding of Dr Kelly by the media that ultimately led to the poor chap taking his life. The media would have found out his name sooner, rather than later. They didn’t need any help from Whitehall.
I am concerned about the independence of the BBC, and the government attacks on it. But the BBC is not blemish free, and until it gets it’s house back in order, it will continue to be under threat.
I think the BBC should have sacked Andrew Gillighan long ago. He had an axe to grind, and wasn’t going to let impartiality get in his way.
The gutter press has got the wind up. They also feel threatened. Shame !
They hate the truth and will fight tooth and nail to preserve their right to peddle lies. They are responsible for the general thrust in the dumbing down of the UK media.
It’s all about keeping the plebs in their place !
Our news is now trivial, shallow and very insular. The gutter press are responsible for the likes of last week’s over-hype of the bad weather warnings; making morons like the Beckhams front page news; and the countless EU/immigrant scare-story-lies.
Unfortunately the BBC seem to have been influenced by these trends. I do think their standards have slipped in recent years. They do seem too concerned with populist LCD ‘entertainment’. Soap operas, phone-ins, sound bites, and the general public on the telly seem to be the order of the day. They need to raise their standards to something well above that of a Sun reader’s comprehension.
Come on BBC – Must try harder, 6/10.
Labour – You have failed us !
Wednesday, 4th February 2004
Dreadbelly
I am often amazed at the statistics I get for this site:
Seems as if you put 'fullers screensaver' into some of the more popular search
engines this site comes out on top or somewhere near the top.
I do occasionally mention Fullers (nice ale), and there is the Ale-Fan screensaver, which is
free to download.
But why doesn't Fullers site come out on top ?
It's all a mystery to me !
Dying for a drink ?
I bet the drinkers at this pub were mortified.
Thankfully this report is not about me.
Friday, 6th February 2004
King James Version
Tonight in Waitrose I was doing my usual, having a good gawp at what other people were purchasing, as I waited to be served.
At the next till up was a bloke, probably only about five years older than me, dressed in a checked barathea jacket, plain dark fawn/taupe trousers, neither were new but both were immaculately pressed, and brown shoes so shiny that you could see your face in them.
He had a haircut that, even when fashionable in the 1950's, would have been unfashionable.
A professional gent, solicitor, accountant or off-duty undertaker.
Tory undoubtedly, mason probably, victim of some minor public school unquestionably.
His shopping was meagre. Shopping for one. Nothing exotic - he's a true blue steak and kidney man.
He's clearly a determined, stiff upper lip type. Always thinking of England. Plays by the rules. The sort of good egg that the Empire was founded upon.
Willing to fight to the death for Queen and country. Always to be relied upon when a fellow chap's on a sticky wicket.
I'm sure you know the sort.
How do I know all this ?
Well the last two items going through the checkout were exactly the same: Two Rolls of Izal Medicated !
Ah !!!!!!!!!!!!!
- I didn't know Izal Medicated was still made.
- I didn't know that Waitrose sold it.
- He's clearly a man with a strong constitution
- And not a tube of Preparation H in sight
- It brings back terrible memories of childhood, outside lavvies, flies and holding your breath in summer, and an extremely cold arse in the winter. Happy days !
Just found this on the interweb.
Monday, 9th February 2004
St. Monday
 Dear God,
if I promise not to keep taking my kit off,
please will you remind me where I left my clothes ?
Tuesday, 10th February 2004
The Passion
What was the first gig you ever went to ?
And what’s more, dare you admit to it ?
Mine was Emerson, Lake & Palmer, Spring 1974, Empire Pool Wembley.
At the time I thought it was brilliant. I’d never seen anything quite like it, especially the finale when one of Keith Emerson’s larger keyboards turned around to face the audience, sprouted wings and fireworks went off.
I was young and impressionable.
I also once went to see Barclay James Harvest, but then we all have our moments of weakness. A friend also claims we went to see Hawkwind, something I have absolutely no recollection of !
The best gig ever was The Clash 1977, Bury Corn Exchange. The sound was awful but that didn’t matter, it was raw, exciting and punk was still quite new. I pogo’d all night long. Fucking marvellous !
Second best gig: Joe Strummer, August 2002, Cambridge. Still the same anger, almost as exciting. Sound was shed-loads better. Joe is sadly missed.
Meanwhile back in 1977, Stranglers, Ipswich Gaumont (their first punk gig), resulted in the first 3 or 4 rows of seats going onto the stage in small bits as they were trampled underfoot by enthusiastic pogo dancers. Loud music and mindless vandalism, you can’t beat it !
Wednesday, 11th February 2004
Ideology
"Ipswich !
Ipswich !
Come on Ipswich !"
The 4th Ipswich Winter Beer Festival gets going this Friday. I hope to attend on Saturday, all being well.
Support your local beer festival - you know it makes sense !
I whole-heartedly recommend this very fine bottled Belgian beer. Westmalle Trappist Dubbel (7%).
A fine example of a Trappist double style beer. Dark, malty flavoured beer with a very full body and only a slight bitter finish.
Thursday, 12th February 2004
Tank Park Salute
Looking through last week's web statistics, at the domain report for this blog, I noticed that there
were 19 visits from '.mil (USA Military)'.
Good grief, could it be I'm under surveillance ?
Am I a threat to the Imperial Empire ?
Am I the new 'Red Peril' ?
Or are they hoping to pick up snippets of intelligence ?
If so here's a couple:
("not a lot of people know this"), Imperial Puppet Bush is a complete tosser, and an all-round arsehole.
Beer called Budweiser needn't taste like horse piss, if you buy the real thing.
Bet those revelations 'll shock them !
Is it my socialist beliefs that they are concerned about, is it the fact
that I've never been into a McDonalds in my life and have no intention of ever
doing so, or is it that I pronounce schedule and mall properly ?
Who can say ?
If my blogging should suddenly stop you know I've probably ended up in room
101.
Paranoid, who's paranoid ?
Saturday, 14th February 2004
The Fourteenth Of February
If you only buy one album this year you could do a lot worse than buying the debut from rock-a-boogie-beat-combo
Franz Ferdinand.
Purchased my copy, on my way home from work on Wednesday night, and life is now shed-loads better for owning it.
It's clear that they are going to be the next big thing, but more than that, I think they are the shot in the arm
that is long overdue for British popular music.
A bit strong, you may think, and you're possibly right, but to me, right now, they are all that a lad
could ask for from the Devils music. My soul is sold.
Sunday, 15th February 2004
Valentine's Day Is Over
Despite nursing a pretty snotty cold, and in a spirit of ‘devotion to duty’, I attended the Ipswich Winter Beer Festival early yesterday afternoon. Anglia Railways were a bit kinder to us this time, as they actually provided a train, and what’s more it was on time.
We were packed in like sardines, and it ended up being standing room only, but hey, you can’t have everything can you.
All the beers I had were most excellent, and for more details about them click here.
I’ve been going to beer festivals now for well over 15 years, usually enjoying the generally relaxed and convivial nature of such events.
You often ‘get chatting’ to complete strangers; it’s quite easy, as you have at least one thing in common, a love of good ale.
Anyway me and my friend got chatting to a couple of blokes that described themselves as ‘tickers’. I was vaguely aware of the term, but this was my first experience of such people.
It would appear that whilst most of us go to festivals to enjoy the beer, the company, and perhaps try some beers that we might not otherwise have access to, the raison d’être of the ‘ticker’ is to always go for new beers, beers they have never drunk before.
‘Tickers’ seem to be driven by the same passion (for that’s what it is) that drives ‘twitchers’, train-spotters and those that bag scottish hills.
Whilst I’m sure they very much enjoy the beer, to them it’s very much a numbers game, cataloguing the beers, the festivals, the pubs. They could tell you exactly when and where they had a particular beer.
What drives such people ?
You can’t say to them that they should get out more, because clearly they are getting out, and probably more than me !
I suppose a bit variety wouldn’t go amiss, it being the spice of life and all that, but if they are happy I suppose we should ‘live and let live’.
Still, they were okay to chat to, and to explode the myth of the stereotype, neither of them were wearing an anorak !
It takes all sorts !
Tuesday, 17th February 2004
Accident Waiting To Happen
A popular pastime here at Hop Mews is stuffing our faces with chocolate.
Man can't live by bread alone, what, what.
One of the many sorts of sweeties we like are Celebrations, those mini Mars bars, Topics and Bountys in a jolly nice cardboard box.
Damned fine tuck !
Anyway, hats of to those wags at Mars for what they print on the bottom of the box. Someone in a large corporation with a sense of humour:
DO NOT READ WHILST BOX IS OPEN
Sunday, 22nd February 2004
Distant Shore
So much to do and so little time to do it .
That and not being able to find my muse has effected my blogging.
But today I’m back with a vengeance. Well sort of.
This afternoon we went to the cinema in Cambridge to watch a French-Canadian film called The Barbarian Invasions, and very good it was indeed.
A large part of the film is based in a hospital in or around Montreal and makes our NHS look wonderfully efficient and well equipped/funded.
It’s a film about a college lecturer dying of cancer, not a bundle of laughs you might think, but it was funny, sad, disturbing and thought provoking.
And if you’ve got to go, he chose an okay way to do it.
If you get the chance, watch it. It’s a jolly good film.
The Lady and I are by and large very please that we have Freeview.
BBC4 is the most watched channel and 6 Music the most listened to.
They put Folk music on the telly – can you believe that ?
Bloody good to see Kate Rusby in concert, on the box, last Friday. It was a bit weird seeing performers you have only ever previously seen live now on the old goggle box !
The music aside one of the best things about having a digi-box is getting the shopping channels.
They’re the most fun you can have with your clothes on !
The basic idea seems to be:
Put some moron (preferably a barrow-boy-type) in front of a camera.
Said person talks enthusiastic bollocks ad infinitum about some very shoddy looking merchandise.
Sometimes there are two (or even three) people in front of the camera – they become almost orgasmic over the products they are flogging.
I hate DIY, but the DIY products are especially good for a laugh.
Epoxy putty would seem to be flavour of the moment – you don’t need any other tools just this putty – it will apparently set/adhere whilst underwater – a boon for those scuba diving DIYers.
I’m also amazed at the amount of watches they seem to be offering. Surely this country has reached watch saturation point by now ?
Everything offered is just so wonderful you’ll wonder how you ever lived without it
Sad people ring up and order said shoddy stuff.
I like the line on one of the channels where they say that when you ring in that “you don’t even have to speak to a real person”
I’ll let you draw your own conclusions about their considered target audience
The words Sun and Reader need to appear somewhere above. I'll leave that to you to decide where.
24th February 2004
The Space Race Is Over
My Terrorist Past.
I haven’t always been the law-abiding citizen I am today.
Once upon a time I lived outside of the law, in the dark and dangerous world of international terrorism.
Mike* and I were explosives experts. We were good at what we did.
Well almost.
In the mid-sixties there was a toy available, called, I think, a jet-ex motor. It was a capsule that was propelled like a jet along a fishing-line stretched between two points. The fuel for this capsule came in pellet form, along with fuses to ignite the fuel. Along with the ‘gun powder’ that we had developed, which was probably akin to that used in fertiliser bombs, made from a couple of ingredients in our chemistry sets, we were a force to be reckoned with. Not bad for junior schoolboys eh ?
I was very fortunate – my childhood was bloody good. I lived on the edge of a market town, on an estate, which merged into farmland. We had loads of space to roam and play.
Mike had a younger brother, Sean*. Sean unfortunately suffered greatly at our hands – I hope we didn’t mentally scar him for life.
Anyway, having had some limited success with various small devices, both incendury and explosive, including creating quite a large bang in a derelict shed, in a neglected field, we decided to go for the big one. Our pyrotechnic confidence had reached such a fever pitch we felt we were ready to experiment with a timed device. Prior to that all the explosives had been ignited by lit fuses. When you try something new it’s usual practice to have trials or a dummy run, but being irrational young lads with very limited resources, we decided to skip the trials and go for the real thing.
The plan was that Sean would be encouraged to take a trip up town on a bus carrying a very small suitcase. The suitcase would contain a device, timed to go off halfway through the journey. It seemed like a jolly good wheeze to us. Better than the proverbial whoopee cushion prank.
We told Sean he had won a competition. He was to go uptown, on the bus, with the small suitcase and a pack of sandwiches, to collect his wonderful prize.
The timer was set. We handed him his written instructions, sandwiches, four pence bus fare and of course the suitcase. And off we set for the bus stop.
Sean was whipped up into a peak of frenzy. He was raring to go. The bus arrived on time. They did in those days. The big moment arrived. The little sod wouldn’t get on the bus. Bang (or not as the case may be) all our plans dashed. We came that close to fame, putting an Eastern Counties Bus into orbit, notoriety and almost certain borstal.
I still shudder when I think of the things we did as kids. It’s a wonder we survived !
* Mike and Sean weren’t their real names, they’ve been changed to protect the innocent. There were really called Peter and Mickey, respectively.
26th February 2004
There Is Power In A Union
As it is National Pubs Week (any excuse really), me and the Lady popped into
Bury's only 'brew-pub' last night.
They usually have three of their own
beers, plus at least two guest ales on as well. The place is usually heaving of
a night time, but well worth the jostle to the bar for a pint.
Toilets are jolly nice, and very clean, which is a bonus.
Not the cheapest
ale in town, but that helps keep out the riff-raff (can't believe I just typed
that !)
CAMRA claim that "There's a pub for everyone", but with around 20 pubs closing a month, this clearly will not always be the case.
The Unacceptable Face Of Brewing - Unions are piling more pressure on Scottish & Newcastle after claiming the company lied to its workforce about the future of its five UK breweries.
Nice entry on Gen X at 40 today about the Hesket Newmarket co-operative. Check it out as they say !
28th February 2004
Baby Faroukh
When I'm not supping ale, one of my favourite drinks is what The Lady calls 'Brown Sticky Stuff',
cola to the rest of us. I know it's disgusting stuff, that is absolutely no good for you at all, but I actually like it.
It has to normal cola of course, none of your diet or caffeine free muck, only the full-on killer sort for yours truly !
I always try, where possible, to avoid buying Coke or Pepsi. I don't see why I should encourage the modern evil that is
American Capitalist Imperialism. White-right-christian fundamentalist-shite.
So I was quite pleased to here about one of the challengers to the evil empire.
It is a company that has been born out of one of the great cultural and wealth producing sectors of our society, our immigrant community. It's name is Qibla, they have a religious dimension, which is perhaps a bit worrying,
but they also have ethical tendencies, unusual for a cola (or any other) company.
I hope they cause big problems for the two US giants.
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